Do you ever find yourself in a mental-emotional place where
your feelings contradict the thing you know to be true? Or when you don’t feel good about the thing
you know to be right, or feel bad about the thing you know to be good?
It’s annoying, but it happens on occasion, and it is
important to at least be able to recognize what is going on so that the
feelings don’t get the upper hand.
I’m going to tell about a weird conversation I had with the
Lord to illustrate how I discovered Satan had been working on me to try to stop
me from making progress.
Heavenly
Father, I don’t understand what’s going on. I have to finish these minutes for
the meeting, but I don’t want to do it. But I also want to do it, and here I am
folding clothes when I should be working on finishing the minutes. I’ve already
done the biggest part of the minutes job, and it shouldn’t be a problem to finish it,
but it feels like it is a huge job hanging over my head and I don’t want
to do it. I know I’m mostly
finished, but I don’t feel how close I am. I know it shouldn’t be a big
deal, but it feels like a big burden. Why am I feeling like this? I know I have troubles finishing tasks as a
symptom of ADD, but this seems different.
I
also know that as I make the action list from the minutes, I will be
creating a task list for myself as well as the other people in the
organization. And when I’m done, I’m going to feel like I have to do all
those tasks immediately instead of getting on to the tasks that are most
important to me that I want to do today. I know I’m going to feel like this
because this has happened in the past. It is possible I’m folding clothes
because I’m trying to show myself I can do some tasks anyway that are important
to me before I finish the minutes. That seems to make it a control issue; I’m
trying to show I have control over what I choose to do.
This
seems like a situation in which my feelings are lying to me. I don’t like that.
Please help me to do what I know I need to do.
Feelings? Really? Is
it “nothing more than feelings”?
Sometimes it is Satan.
It is Satan who attempts to hijack feelings like that.
Feelings are very powerful, and they are useful for motivation, but they are
changeable and can be manipulated. This is why it is a great safeguard that we
are promised in the D&C the Lord will tell us things in both our mind and our heart.
When I finished my prayer, it was clear to me that Satan had
been trying to attack me through my feelings. And if he’s doing that to me, he
probably does that to you too. My prayers to Heavenly Father talking about the
situation helped me realize it and know what I needed to do. (I trust that when
I get done, I will feel happy about it, and the obstructing feelings will
dissipate.)
Don’t let Satan win.
3 comments:
You're not alone! I experience those times too. I think I have those same kinds of conversations with HF frequently. I also believe that he is patient, kind and understanding of our weaknesses and foibles; after all, he created us and knows us better than we know ourselves. Press forward with faith!
Yeah, I know I'm not alone. But it can sure feel like it sometimes, can't it?
Thanks for commenting!
It tends to jar me when I realize I don't want to do something badly enough that I'll do laundry instead. What's next, cleaning the drains?
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