The Cunning Plan of the Evil One

27 But wo unto him that has the law given, yea, that has all the commandments of God, like unto us, and that transgresseth them, and that wasteth the days of his probation, for awful is his state!

28 O that cunning plan of the evil one! O the vainness, and the frailties, and the foolishness of men! When they are learned they think they are wise, and they hearken not unto the counsel of God, for they set it aside, supposing they know of themselves, wherefore, their wisdom is foolishness and it profiteth them not. And they shall perish.

29 But to be learned is good if they hearken unto the counsels of God. (2 Nephi 27-29)

It’s a well-known scripture, memorized by many seminary students over the years.

Recently I was reading it over, and I noticed some things.

I noticed Jacob observes on the cunning plan of the evil one, but he doesn’t seem to elaborate on what that cunning plan is, but goes on talk about “the vainness, and the frailties, and the foolishness of men.”

I realized that we have to infer some things. We have to realize it is the devil who tries to use those things. He also tries to make us think our learning makes us wise enough that we don’t have to listen to the counsels of God.

Learning doesn’t automatically translate into wisdom, as I’m sure many of my readers know. “Learning” in the gospel is like knowing in your head that stealing is a sin, but “wisdom” could be represented as the point where you can realize when you’re being tempted to steal and you can resist it successfully once and for the rest of your life.

Jacob mourns over the vainness, frailties, and foolishness of men. It hit me this time reading that after having had a number of temptations recently targeted specifically at my vanity, frailties, and foolishness.  Satan really does try to use those things against us.

Vainness is our pride.  Because of our divine nature, we know we have the potential to become something so much greater…  But Satan tries to use that against us, twisting it into a desire for ascendency, hostility toward authority, notions that we are better than others.  He tries to use it to destroy any notion that we need to be humble. He wants to keep us from achieving the meekness that we need to turn to Christ, to repent, and to grow, and to learn from anyone else. 

Frailties represent our mortal weaknesses and limitations. We can’t live long without discovering we have these, yet Satan will try to conceal them from us.  Or he will try to make us think that we can’t overcome them, to make them into our prison. Or he will stress us in moments of weakness (hunger, loneliness, fatigue, discomfort) to get us to sin.

Foolishness.  Today we think this means “stupidity,” but it had a different meaning before, evoking the tendency to backslide, to err, to go apostate, to wander from the truth, or even to rebel.  Mormon observed on man’s falseness and unsteadiness, quickness to do iniquity and slowness to do good, how quick to be proud and slow to be humble. (see Helaman 12:1,4-5)  We all have a tendency to wander or divert, which we have to recognize and curtail whenever we notice it starting to take over. Satan tries to use it and exacerbate it.

Our best weapons against vanity, frailty, and foolishness are probably humility, grace, and repentance.

Clean, but not all

Verily I say unto you, my servant William, that you are clean, but not all; repent, therefore, of those things which are not pleasing in my sight, saith the Lord, for the Lord will show them unto you. (D&C 66:3)

This verse was directed to William W. McClellan. That part about William being “clean, but not all” puzzled me a bit. How can that be? It is like saying, “You are clean, but not clean.”

Eventually I realized it might have something to do with still having the same tendencies to make the same mistakes, or having the same weaknesses, even though one has been forgiven of the sins one has already committed. At some point, the deeper fault of character has to be discovered, repented of, or healed by Christ’s grace. The Lord can show us where those faults are.

The prospect of being shown where our faults are is a little scary, I admit.  But I have observed that there is a difference between when the Lord shows me my faults versus when Satan shows me my faults. (And believe me, Satan would love to rub the noses of conscientious Saints in their faults and imperfections!)

When Satan does so, it is intended to depress and discourage me and make me feel I am so far away from what I should be that I might as well give up all hope because no effort will succeed.

When the Lord shows me my faults, I understand and feel how they grieve Him, and I see that I must take action, but I retain the sense that repentance is possible and worth it. I feel that Christ will help me, and while I know that I am “less than the dust of the earth,” as Mormon observed, I still feel the Lord’s love for me and feel encouraged.

Sifting as Chaff

And let my servant Lyman Wight beware, for Satan desireth to sift him as chaff. (D&C 52:12)

Gospeldoctrine.com has some little explanation about this that I thought useful to include:

"Chaff is the non-nutritious waste product of wheat and is separated from the grain by the wind when it is tossed into the air. This process is called sifting. Chaff is like a rudderless vessel that is driven at will by the wind. Satan desires to sift the Saints like chaff, to separate them from the soul-saving, nutritious grain of the gospel and carry them away in the winds of wickedness." (Hoyt W. Brewster, Jr., Doctrine and Covenants Encyclopedia [Salt Lake City: Bookcraft, 1988], 520.)

"[Lyman Wight] had been ordained a High Priest at the Conference and had received a vision. He was a most zealous and successful missionary. He was fearless as a lion in the defense of the Saints, and he was a terror to the enemy. At the April Conference, 1841, he was appointed an Apostle. But, notwithstanding all, there was a flaw in his character which the Lord saw, and of which He warned him in this Revelation. In April, 1844, he was tried before the High Council at Far West for teaching false doctrine. He acknowledged his fault then and was forgiven. But, after the martyrdom of the Prophet. he declared that he would not turn his hand over to be one of the Twelve, and when the Saints went to the Rocky Mountains, as the Prophet Joseph had predicted they would do, he and George Miller led a small company to Texas. Wight died in that State, March 31, 1858." (Hyrum M. Smith and Janne M. Sjodahl, Doctrine and Covenants Commentary [Salt Lake City: Deseret Book Co., 1978], 305.)

So back to this idea of chaff being like a rudderless vessel driven at will by the wind. There are two problems that can cause us to behave like chaff more than grain. 1) Rudderless- without using our agency to choose, we let others steer our lives. 2) Driven by the wind – without our own good purposes to drive us and motivate us, without the Lord’s purposes to bring about our immortality and eternal life, we are at the mercy of the purposes and drives of others and every wind of doctrine in society.

Furthermore, our faults in our character give Satan an opening to try to chisel us away from the Saints and the church. In Lyman Wight’s case, he seems to have been okay as long as Joseph Smith was alive, but once Joseph was dead, something in him balked at uniting with and working with the other apostles. He didn’t acknowledge their authority or see why he should unite with them.

We all have some particular weakness(es) that Satan will try to use to separate us from the church. We don’t have specific warnings addressed to us in the Doctrine and Covenants like Lyman Wight, but we do have patriarchal blessings, which usually have particular warnings in them. I have warnings in mine that I did not understand the need for until maybe 20 years after getting it.

How Ether 12:27 Blesses Us

And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them. (Ether 12:27)

As I ran across this scripture recently and how it invites us to come to Christ in humility about our weaknesses to be made strong , it occurred to me that this may be a doctrine and invitation given nowhere else.  I thought it might be interesting to do a survey of the scriptures to see what we are told elsewhere about weakness and being made strong.

Here’s what I found.

Ether 12:28 -- God will show the Gentiles their weakness and that faith, hope, and charity will bring them to God.

Ether 12:37 -- God tells Moroni he will be made strong because he has seen his weakness. (This tells us noticing our weakness is the first step toward being made strong, but the next steps are not there because they were given in Ether 12:27.)

Alma 58:37 -- Helaman trusts the Lord will deliver his people notwithstanding the weakness of their armies.  (We can see Helaman is applying the principles of faith in Christ and humility in a military context, but we need to know it works in other contexts too.)

D&C 1:24 -- Commandments are given to God’s servants in their weakness so they can come to understanding. (And probably trying to follow commandments shows us our weakness pretty quick..)

Jacob 4:7 – God shows men their weaknesses so they know only by His power and condescension can they do miracles.

D&C 62:1  -- Christ knows the weaknesses of men and how to succor those who are tempted.

Hebrews 4:15-16 -- Christ can be touched with our infirmities, so we can boldly come to Him and obtain grace to help at time of need.  (This gets pretty close to Ether 12:27, but the humility and faith in Christ are implied rather than explicitly stated.)

Hebrews 3:21-- Prophets and great men were made strong out of their weakness.  (This tells us others enjoyed the blessing of being made strong in their weakness, but it doesn’t tell us about how.)

2 Nephi 3:21 -- God will make the weakness of the Nephites’ words to their brethren strong in their faith. (This shows us the principles of faith in Christ and humility can be applied in the context of writing about the gospel for others.  But it isn’t explicit about the humility needed.)

2 Nephi 33:44 -- Nephi has faith that the words he has written in weakness will be made strong to his people.

D&C 38:14 -- The Lord will be merciful to our weakness. 

So it seems that other scriptures have pieces of this doctrine and invitation, Ether 12:27 shares it most clearly.  It gives us confidence that humility in our weaknesses and taking them to the Lord in faith will allow the Lord to strengthen us. 

I also notice, that the other scriptures expand on the doctrine and give examples of different ways prophets have been made strong.  Nephi and Moroni both had their words made strong. Helaman had his armies made strong.  Jacob was able to do miracles.

Today when we notice our weaknesses, let’s take them straight to the Lord for His help. Let’s find out how the Lord can strengthen us.

How the scriptures build our faith

I ran across these verses that I think perfectly capture the process by which reading the scriptures regularly builds our faith and testimony.

6 Wherefore, we search the prophets, and we have many revelations and the spirit of prophecy; and having all these witnesses we obtain a hope, and our faith becometh unshaken, insomuch that we truly can command in the name of Jesus and the very trees obey us, or the mountains, or the waves of the sea.

7 Nevertheless, the Lord God showeth us our weakness that we may know that it is by his grace, and his great condescensions unto the children of men, that we have power to do these things. (Jacob 4:6-7)

So first, we read the scriptures and search the prophecies in them.  In the process of doing that day after day, the Holy Ghost gives us daily revelation and even prophecies of Christ (testimonies of Christ).

Those revelations and prophecy join with the scriptures to become a cloud of witness to us, certifying that those things are true. Then we obtain a hope of a future day that we will be rewarded if we diligently obey God’s commandments as written in the scriptures.  We also hope for something better than the present.

With this hope, we act with faith and over the process of time our faith becomes unshaken through our diligence.

And with unshaken faith, anything becomes possible, even (according to Jacob) commanding the elements that they obey.  Verrrrrrrry intriguing.

And yet, our reading (and revelation) shows us also our weaknesses and we realize that we still have so much to learn. We see that none of these things is possible without the power of Christ.

It is neat to see this process all laid out for us in black and white.  Without it, we have a hard time articulating exactly what the blessings of studying the scriptures are. And in fact, we can see that there is much more to be gained than simply a knowledge of the gospel or a testimony.  We see hope, faith, and even power over the elements through the grace of God.  Those are blessings to look for and strive for.

January First Presidency Message: The Best Time to Plant a Tree

I really liked the First Presidency message for this month by President Uchtdorf, so I want to comment on it. (My words in black, his in green.) It seems to me that one of President Uchtdorf’s great strengths as an apostle is his exuberant enthusiasm and hopefulness.    

In ancient Rome, Janus was the god of beginnings. He was often depicted with two faces—one looking back on the past, the other looking forward to the future. Some languages name the month of January after him because the beginning of the year was a time for reflection as well as planning.

Thousands of years later, many cultures throughout the world carry on a tradition of making resolutions for the new year. Of course, making resolutions is easy—keeping them is a different thing altogether.

One man who had made a long list of New Year’s resolutions felt pretty good about his progress. He thought to himself, “So far, I’ve stuck to my diet, I haven’t lost my temper, I’ve kept to my budget, and I haven’t once complained about the neighbor’s dog. But today is January 2 and the alarm just went off and it’s time I got out of bed. It’s going to take a miracle to keep my streak going.”

It’s SO TRUE!!  For some reason when we start a new resolution, it is pretty easy to do it for a day or two.. or three.  But at some point the shiny wears off and then it seems like a long, hard slog.  Or something comes up that gets in the way.  Or we slack off our effort because we think we don’t need to work as hard at it as we have. 

There is something incredibly hopeful about a fresh start. I suppose at one time or another we have all wanted to start again with a clean slate.

I love getting a new computer with a clean hard drive. For a time it works perfectly. But as the days and weeks pass by and more and more programs get installed (some intentional, some not so intentional), eventually the computer begins to stall, and things it used to do quickly and efficiently become sluggish. Sometimes it doesn’t work at all. Even getting it to start can become a chore as the hard drive becomes cluttered with miscellaneous chaos and electronic debris. There are times when the only recourse is to reformat the computer and start over.

Human beings can likewise become cluttered with fears, doubts, and burdensome guilt. The mistakes we have made (both intentional and unintentional) can weigh upon us until it may seem hard to do what we know we should.

In the case of sin, there is a wonderful reformatting process called repentance that allows us to clear our internal hard drives of the clutter that burdens our hearts. The gospel, through the miraculous and compassionate Atonement of Jesus Christ, shows us the way to cleanse our souls of the stain of sin and once again become new, pure, and as innocent as a child.

But sometimes other things slow us down and hold us back, causing unproductive thoughts and actions that make it hard for us to get started.

I’d say the experience with computers is a very useful metaphor here. (And I'm not sure why I like it so much, but I do.)

Along with repentance, we need grace (enabling power of God) to help us make it through life, but we can’t have it without giving our total effort and commitment to it.  And so often we would give that total effort except we have fallen prey to destructive thought patterns that in some way weaken us.  I love that Elder Uchtdorf teaches many principles (not just here but in other talks too) that help us discover destructive thought patterns and helps us replace them with helpful ones instead. 

I have a lot of troubles with doubts, fears, and perfectionism.  I feel like I’m always fighting it, so I appreciate principles that help me escape those unproductive patterns.

Setting goals is a worthy endeavor. We know that our Heavenly Father has goals because He has told us that His work and glory is “to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man” (Moses 1:39).

Our personal goals can bring out the best in us. However, one of the things that derail our efforts in making and keeping resolutions is procrastination. We sometimes delay starting, waiting for the right moment to begin—the first day of a new year, the beginning of summer, when we’re called as bishop or Relief Society president, after the kids get into school, after we retire.

You don’t need an invitation before you start moving in the direction of your righteous goals. You don’t need to wait for permission to become the person you were designed to be. You don’t need to wait to be invited to serve in the Church.

We can sometimes waste years of our lives waiting to be chosen (see D&C 121:34–36). But that is a false premise. You are already chosen!

I felt like this part really spoke to me.  Procrastination is one of my problems, though I don’t actually say to myself, “I’ll do it later.”  My procrastination has been in the form that Elder Uchtdorf has described above, the kind that wants to wait for the “right moment” and the kind that feels like it needs permission to do or become or start. 

My procrastination has to do with writing.  I am a writer.  So often I delay starting my writing because I’m waiting for the right moment.  But what does the right moment look like and how will I know I’ve come to it?  I keep waiting for a moment when I will feel inspired.  It is particularly insidious when it comes to working on this blog because I want to be inspired as I write about the scriptures.   The weird thing is, I’ve learned by experience that inspiration happens more while I’m working on it and rather than when I’m thinking about working on it.  So I just have to show up and start studying and writing and then it comes.

I’ve also seen some of my procrastination in the form of feeling like I need permission from someone.  One of the things I want to do is write fiction, write fabulous novels.  But I feel like I need permission!  I don’t know who from.  Maybe it’s because I have this deep-down notion that writing fiction is play, not real work.  It makes me think that just like you need mom to call the school to so you can go somewhere else during school, I need someone to call the “work police” and tell them that I have permission to write fiction for work instead of getting hired by someone else.   Maybe I need to write myself out a permission slip.  (I eventually did this.  It felt very freeing.)

I like that President Uchtdorf says our personal goals can bring out the best in us.  (Of course, he makes the implicit assumption that these goals are righteous.)  When you consider the effort that goes into working toward goals, you can see he’s right.  What else besides a goal makes you wrestle with the natural man?  Good goals always involve repentance at some level or stage.  A good goal that speaks to you fires your imagination, giving you vision.  It requires confidence and faith.  It requires you to commit and act courageously.  It requires analysis of skills and leads to learning more skills.  It leads to problem-solving.  It disciplines you and builds your perseverance.  And even when we fail, we practice repentance and re-commitment if we try again.

At times in my life I have spent sleepless nights grappling with issues, worries, or personal sorrows. But no matter how dark the night, I am always encouraged by this thought: in the morning the sun will rise.

With every new day, a new dawn comes—not only for the earth but also for us. And with a new day comes a new start—a chance to begin again.

This view of the new day as the chance to begin trying again is a big thing that gives me hope.  I’ve lived a few months when I was depressed and felt that I had no hope of anything better.  When I’ve struggled with a bad habit for so long and failed so many times, it is easy to think that there is no hope of change and that the future will get worse and worse and I should just give up and drift as the current takes me.  I’ve learned to fight this by seeing each new day as a gift of a small time that I can concentrate my efforts in.  We learn from living the commandment of keeping the Sabbath Holy that it is possible to make one day different from every other day of the week, more focused on serving God.  So we can use that same principle during the week.  Each new day we can try again to break bad habits.  Also, taking it one day at a time helps me focus on the present moment rather than worrying about the future. 

Sometimes the thing that holds us back is fear. We might be afraid that we won’t succeed, that we will succeed, that we might be embarrassed, that success might change us, or that it might change the people we love.

I’ve feared all those things at one time or another.  When fears are paralyzing, I’ve found I have to write down what I’m afraid of and try to get to the root of what is bothering me.  (I have an example of how I do this in my post about confronting myfears of introducing my neighbors to the missionaries.

It’s usually not just one fear, it is a network of fear, or a pyramid of fear, fears stacked on top of each other.  You have to pin down the fear, drag it squealing out into the day, and then talk back to it before you can kill it.

Another thing we need to remember when it comes to setting goals is this: We almost certainly will fail—at least in the short term. But rather than be discouraged, we can be empowered because this understanding removes the pressure of being perfect right now. It acknowledges from the beginning that at one time or another, we may fall short. Knowing this up front takes away much of the surprise and discouragement of failure.

When we approach our goals this way, failure doesn’t have to limit us. Remember, even if we fail to reach our ultimate, desired destination right away, we will have made progress along the road that will lead to it.

And that matters—it means a lot.

Even though we might fall short of our finish line, just continuing the journey will make us greater than we were before.

Falling short and failure is a not an end destination.  It is merely a stage in our progression. 

When I apply this to myself about my writing process, I can understand perfectly well that my first draft is not going to be a masterpiece.  It’s going to be crud.  But I can learn from it and revise.  My first novel likewise is going to fall short as well, but I’ll learn from it and revise it and my next novel will be better (although the first draft can be crud all over again.)  I can allow myself to write badly at first so I can learn from it.  (I suppose I’ll have to write myself a permission slip for that too.  ;-))

An old proverb says, “The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The second-best time is now.”

There is something wonderful and hopeful about the word now. There is something empowering about the fact that if we choose to decide now, we can move forward at this very moment.

Now is the best time to start becoming the person we eventually want to be—not only 20 years from now but also for all eternity.

Sometimes it takes years for us to figure out that we really want what’s good for us.  And then we wish we’d started way earlier.  I’ve heard some converts wishing they’d found the gospel earlier in life.  I imagine we all have something like that. 

At least the present moment remains for making a beginning, right?

So what experiences have you had in which you learned more from the process than you did from the outcome?

Thinking about the Mote and the Beam

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4  And again, ye shall say unto them, Why is it that thou beholdest the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?

5  Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and canst not behold a beam in thine own eye? (JST Matthew 7:4-5)

I think it is interesting that Jesus asked “WHY is it that thou beholdest the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?”   It kind of shows how silly it is to notice someone else’s faults instead of one’s own.  I think Jesus implies that the proper response should be to allow our notice of others’ faults act as an indicator to us that the very same ones exist in us.  (As the saying goes, “It takes one to know one.”)  I don’t think this is meant just to quell fault-finding with others, but also as a call to repentance of the “beam” issues. 

We usually don’t have an idea of how our bad behavior makes others feel, so to see someone else acting the same way and to suffer from it can be a helpful call to repentance.  

I had an experience last week when I thought my husband was selfish.  I called him on it and in the ensuing discussion was brought to the realization that I had been much worse. 

Nephi’s Sense of Weakness About His Writing, 1 Nephi 19:6-7

6 Nevertheless, I do not write anything upon plates save it be that I think it be sacred. And now, if I do err, even did they err of old;

not that I would excuse myself because of other men,

but because of the weakness which is in me, according to the flesh, I would excuse myself.

7 For the things which some men esteem to be of great worth,

both to the body and soul,

others set at naught and trample under their feet.

Yea, even the very God of Israel do men trample under their feet;

I say, trample under their feet but I would speak in other words—

they set him at naught, and hearken not to the voice of his counsels.(1 Nephi 19:6-7)

Nephi realizes that he may lack some perspective about what makes a piece of writing sacred and in erring, he may write things that are not so sacred while thinking it is sacred, or accidently leave out something sacred while thinking that it isn’t.  He also realizes there is a chance that his readers may not understand the sacredness of what he wants to share and may reject what he writes.

I think it is interesting that he notes that men of old made this same mistake.  That implies that after years of poring over the brass plates and the scriptures therein, he has formed certain opinions about the relative level of sacredness of various sections of the recorded text.  (Of course, if Nephi realizes he himself may err in his writing, he probably realizes that he may be setting at naught important parts of the brass plates somehow because of the weakness of his flesh.)

I think “weakness of the flesh” is a pretty good assessment of the problem.  Our poor mortal carcasses can only hear so much before the cognitive load becomes too great.  We sense more by our need to know than by any inherent holiness of the things themselves.  Principle 1 may be just as holy and sacred as principle 2, but because we desperately need principle 2, we ignore principle 1.  Just as an example, when I listen to general conference, I find myself more interested in the doctrines that address my needs and everything else seems less shiny and more “meh.”  Not that everything else really is “meh,” but the weakness of my flesh makes it seem so.   Sometimes I can sense that a talk has great significance, but I just can’t cognitively grasp what that is because I’m not spiritually ready for it.  (It’s a good thing the talks are put in the Ensign so I can study them.)

I like that Nephi does not spend much time dwelling on his weakness or worrying about it.  He simply does his best.  I suppose he has hope that the things he finds sacred will somehow find their way to those who need them, even if others are not yet spiritually receptive enough.

I think a lot of what I do for this blog is to search for the sacred things that previously I did not esteem as highly, study them to discover their significance, and then seek for ways to convey that sacredness so they can be appreciated as they deserve.  No doubt I still make mistakes at this because of the weakness of my flesh and it may be that I sometimes seem boring when words can’t capture what the Spirit can communicate in an instant, but I still hope to share something edifying.  I am so often encouraged by all the other wonderful blogs out there that share sacred things.  It is amazing that writing can do as well as it does to convey thoughts across time and space to someone else.

Book Review: Weakness is Not Sin, by Wendy Ulrich

Weakness is Not Sin by Wendy Ulrich is about how weakness and sin are different.  It explores how repentance (the appropriate response to sin) and humility (the appropriate response to weakness) both resemble each other and differ, but focuses on how humility will help us bring the grace of Christ to work on our weaknesses and how it can help us turn those weaknesses into strengths.   

While it is clear that sin must be repented of, Ulrich points out that trying to repent of weakness will not work; we can’t promise never to be weak again.  Instead, weakness is an invitation to be humble and turn to God for divine help (grace) and this is how Saints must continue to use the Atonement in their lives.

Ulrich shows we need to learn to discern the difference between when we have sinned and when we have merely been weak.   She lists different kinds of weaknesses and classifies them so that the reader can see how they aren’t sin but are simply part of the mortal condition, such as physical disease, emotional/mental illness, susceptibility to temptation, predispositions we are born with, emotional suffering from trauma, deficits of upbringing and culture, limitations on time and  energy, and so on.

Ulrich also makes distinction between humility and shame, showing that shame can make us “embarrassed before God, turning ‘divine discontent’ over our weaknesses into discouragement or humiliation as we imagine His shaking finger” while humility, on the other hand, informs us of our true relationship with God and our equality with our brothers and sisters.  She does this so that we don’t accidently confuse shame with humility and think shame is a virtue. 

Previous to reading this book, I lived by the notion that weaknesses were something I needed to repent of, and I would wonder why I couldn’t seem to get away from them.  (I have New Years resolutions that I have carried over several years because I felt like I hadn’t made any progress.) 

I loved that Ulrich swept my misconceptions away in the very first chapter with a carefully constructed line of reasoning that helped me to perfectly understand how humility could help me and how humility would help me access the Lord’s grace through the Atonement.   I felt like my knowledge of what Christ’s Atonement could do for me doubled in size and I felt that I learned enough to apply the principles in my life.  I also feel that I understand humility better.  Humility has been extremely hard for me to pin down and get my head around, but by identifying humility as a process, Ulrich has taught me that humility can look like different things, depending on where I am in the process.

I also appreciated Ulrich’s discussion of shame versus guilt.  She named different types of shame and described them in a way that I’m sure would allow most people to be able to self-identify if they felt ashamed of something.  I hadn’t realized that I had so much shame in my life about failure, and Ulrich recommends dissecting our shame as a way to prepare to take steps to combat it. 

Another portion of Ulrich’s book that I found particularly well done was her chapter “When I Am Weak, Then Am I Strong” in which she listed six ways that the Lord can make our weaknesses strong.  None of them were unfamiliar to me, but I had never seen them all collected and connected together before and it gave me a glorious view of the possible ways we can look forward to gaining strength when we humbly turn to God. 

I also liked that Ulrich spent a chapter describing how we can find joy in discovering and living to our strengths because they are a way for us to express our authentic self.  It reminded me that weaknesses aren’t the only part of our character that deserves attention; strengths do too.

Who will appreciate this book

This book will be an absolute godsend to anyone who has struggled to overcome their weaknesses and who have felt discouragement at lack of progress.  I know it was a real eye-opener for me and I am really excited about what I learned from it.  I think I’ve already recommended it to at least six family and friends. (If you’re still wondering whether this book is worth it, you can read a sample chapter of Weakness is Not Sin on the Deseret Book website.)

Favorite Quotes

(I wish I could insert whole chapters, because much of what Ulrich says builds upon itself, but I’ll have to be content with giving you a few paragraphs and lines.)

“We can think we are dealing with weakness when we are really in a state of sin; this is an extremely dangerous position because then we don’t repent and qualify for forgiveness but remain in our sinful state.  We can also think we are dealing with a sin we just can’t seem to repent of when we are really dealing with a weakness; this is also a dangerous position because we can easily become discouraged, give up on ourselves and God, stop trying, give in to sin, or deny ourselves the joy and peace that are rightfully ours as those who are actually clean before the Lord.” (p35)

“It seems sometimes that so much of life is about finding the fine lines between laziness and moderation, between sin and weakness, between the Spirit and our own thoughts, between confidence and pride, between humility and humiliation.  But at least it is a start to know that there is in fact a difference and that the difference is worth exploring.  Trying to discern the real boundaries and edges…is not easy.  We will not always get it right, but we can get closer and closer as we “watch” ourselves and reflect on the results of our choices.” (p41)

“Patience teaches us that this precise moment is tolerable.  As we respond to what this moment requires of us, the future will take care of itself.” (p70)

“…my heart is convicted by the following observation from Hugh Nibley, professor emeritus at Brigham Young University: ‘The [spiritual] gifts are not in evidence today, except for one gift, which you notice the people ask for—the gift of healing. They ask for that with honest intent and with sincere hearts, and we really have that gift, because we are desperate and nobody else can help us….As for these other gifts—how often do we ask for them?  How earnestly do we seek them? We could have them if we did ask, but we don’t. ‘Well, who denies them?’ Anyone who doesn’t ask for them.’” (p71)

“Many of our most important strengths grow out of the seeds of weakness in one way or another.  The puny, crushable seed and the strong, vibrant tree are not different in their essence, only in their stage of development….Our job is not to transform weakness into something completely different but to create the conditions conducive to growth from the first state to the second.  Those conditions include humility and faith.” (p101)

“Sometimes strengths and weaknesses are flip sides of the same coin: What appears as weakness in one context may be strength another context or from another perspective.” (p102)

“…each of us in one way or another can develop strengths to compensate for our weaknesses—strengths that allow us to succeed in unlikely places and against the odds.” (p103)

“The humility that can emerge from seeing our weakness fosters the very virtues that fit us to sit down with God.  In particular, humility about our weakness can teach us charity, the strength Moroni declares is essential to eternal life with God:’Except men shall have charity they cannot inherit that place which thou hast prepared in the mansions of thy Father’ (Ether 12:34)”  (p107)

“On more than one occasion when I felt I did not deserve it, [God] has stepped in anyway and made my less-than-best effort or less-than-smartest decision or less-than-noblest motivation work, compensating for my weakness with His strength.” (p109)

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Left to themselves

 11 Now this great loss of the Nephites, and the great slaughter which was among them, would not have happened had it not been for their wickedness and their abomination which was among them; yea, and it was among those also who professed to belong to the church of God.

 12 And it was because of the pride of their hearts, because of their exceeding riches, yea, it was because of their oppression to the poor, withholding their food from the hungry, withholding their clothing from the naked, and smiting their humble brethren upon the cheek, making a mock of that which was sacred, denying the spirit of prophecy and of revelation, murdering, plundering, lying, stealing, committing adultery, rising up in great contentions, and deserting away into the land of Nephi, among the Lamanites—

 13 And because of this their great wickedness, and their boastings in their own strength, they were left in their own strength; therefore they did not prosper, but were afflicted and smitten, and driven before the Lamanites, until they had lost possession of almost all their lands.

 14 But behold, Moronihah did preach many things unto the people because of their iniquity, and also Nephi and Lehi, who were the sons of Helaman, did preach many things unto the people, yea, and did prophesy many things unto them concerning their iniquities, and what should come unto them if they did not repent of their sins. (Helaman 4:11-14)

In these verses, Mormon tells how the Nephites would not have lost their lands in battle to the Lamanites if they hadn’t been wicked, and he lists the wickedness that lost them their possessions and ends up with the observation that boasting in their own strength caused them to be left to themselves.  But based on the previous list of wicked things they were doing, it is evident that their “strength” was actually weakness.

Since I don’t want to focus on the negative right now, I’m going to take each of the elements in the list, point out the opposite virtue, then show how the virtue makes strong.

Pride à humility.  Humility makes strong because it involves a true idea of what your abilities are, no more, no less.  Humility allows you to appreciate skill greater than your own and allows you to aspire to improve and take instruction.

Exceeding riches à exceeding poverty.  Exceeding poverty makes strong because it pushes one to continuous effort to provide for one’s self.  It builds creativity and resourcefulness. 

Oppression to the poor à Nurturing the poor.  Nurturing the poor builds strength in that it helps one expand one’s concerns past the narrow confines of self.

Withholding food à imparting food.  Imparting food builds strength in that it teaches one how to cook for larger numbers, it increases skills of hospitality, and it expands ability to have compassion on others.

Withholding clothing from the naked à Giving clothing to the naked.  Giving clothing builds strength by increasing ability to have compassion and helping one realize what clothing is really needed.  It makes one strong enough to live with less.

Smiting humble brethren on the cheek à Lifting up the hands that hang down.  Lifting up the hands that hang down builds strength because it requires that one look outside oneself to understand the struggles of other people and find ways to encourage them.

Making a mock of the sacred à Reverencing the sacred.  Reverencing the sacred makes us stronger because it teaches us to adapt our behavior in the presence of greatness.  It builds our humility and ability to appreciate spiritual things.  It prevents us from becoming creatures dominated only by the physical and temporal.  It allows us to transcend the material.

Denying the spirit of prophecy and revelation à Affirming and cultivating the spirit of prophecy and revelation.  Affirming and cultivating prophecy and revelation makes us strong because it leaves us open to greater wisdom that comes from above.  It opens our minds to the possibilities of hope in redemption and exaltation even though we don’t see with our eyes the events that made it possible.  Hope for the future galvanizes us to act with faith to prepare and change and do things impossible or improbable for the natural man.

Murdering à Giving life/having mercy/saving life.  Those things make us strong because through them we affirm that we are not the only ones deserving to live.  It calls for greater efforts to work out conflicts.  It calls out our capabilities for altruism and heroic self-sacrifice.

Plundering à Giving.  Giving makes us strong because it gets us out of ourselves and helps us recognize the needs of others.  It also tends to decrease our own estimation of what we need.

Lying à Telling the truth.  Telling the truth makes us strong by strengthening our ability to communicate with others and see the truth about ourselves.  It can lead to greater humility.

Stealing à Asking.  Asking strengthens us by requiring us to believe in the generosity of others, that they will understand our need, have compassion, and give.  It requires us to be clear about our needs (versus our wants).

Committing adultery à Chastity and fidelity.  Chastity and fidelity make us strong because they teach us to control our passions and to focus them in ways that build a strong family unit.  They help us strengthen our ability to love even when it gets hard.  It requires us to learn to appreciate and strengthen a seasoned and mature relationship where time-tested trust is a factor.

Rising up in great contentions à Making peace.  Making peace brings strength because the effort requires us to understand the roots of the conflict, who the parties of the conflict are, how to negociate, and how to reassure and act in ways that build trust and dissolve concerns.  It requires developing enough of an understand of both sides in order to find common ground.

Deserting away à Remaining loyal in one’s post.  Remaining loyal requires one to search for the good in what is currently irritationg and find better reasons for staying than for leaving.  It builds strength to stick it out even when circumstances are uncomfortable.

Now, having examined what kind of strength can come from those different virtues, we also should be able to understand the weakness that would result from breaking the associated commandments.  Thus, when we are told in verse 13 that the Nephites boasted in their own strength (even as they broke the commandments), we see how idiotic they were, and it should be no wonder to us that “they did not prosper, but were afflicted and smitten and driven.”

This shows me that the strength of a community or a state or a nation is the sum total of the strength of the individuals in it, and that strength is based on virtues and keeping the commandments.  For me, a practical message I get from this is if certain afflictions may be rooted in failure to keep the commandments, then I can overcome them with greater faithfulness.  Also, it reminds me of something I've noticed in my own life that when I boast (even internally) of my own strength, I am quickly brought to realize how weak I really am.  It is as if the impulse to boast is a sign of weakness, a sign that I have deceived myself into believing that I am strong when I am not.

We cannot say, “I have no need of you”

21 And the eye cannot say unto the hand, I have no need of thee: nor again the head to the feet, I have no need of you.

22 Nay, much more those members of the body, which seem to be more feeble, are necessary: (1 Cor. 12:21-22)

I’m glad Paul took the trouble to explain this about the body of the church because it helps me consider my own ignorance about my fellow Saints.

I recall in my previous ward there was an aged sister and her husband who, when they were called on in church classes, tended to make comments unrelated or only tangentially associated to the topic of discussion.  The husband in particular seemed to like bringing up screwy quotations by Brigham Young in a way that often subverted rather than supported the points the teacher was trying to make.  I remember this brother bearing testimony on three separate fast Sundays that the Savior fell down three times in the garden of Gethsemane.  He placed a special emphasis on the falls and the number of falls that I couldn’t understand. (Even more puzzling was that it never says in scripture that Christ fell three times..)  His wife would bear emotional testimony in a wandering sort of way, working in her profound grief over her grandchildren living half the world away from her.  As a writer interested in skillful crafting of prose, I was often embarrassed for them.  Sometimes I had to stop listening, but other times I just tried to understand the feeling they were trying to express.  Later, much became clear to me when this sister was put in a nursing home with dementia because her husband was too feeble and fall-prone to take care of her himself.

I think of this couple when I read the above verses, and I’ve often pondered in what way they were necessary to our ward if their discourse wasn’t linear or profound.

Eventually I realized that they set a great example of love of family and love of the gospel, especially in old age.  They presented a stalwart picture of what it means to endure to the end.  Even as her mental faculties degenerated, her commitment shone through.  Even as his legs weakened and his balance wavered, his dedication was rock solid.  Their testimonies might wander or seem impenetrable, but they still felt and recognized the Spirit, then stood to bear witness in the best way they could.  Not only that, their weaknesses became an opportunity for our ward to be charitable, to be saintly, to bear with them.  I didn’t hear anyone express scorn, unkindness, or impatience toward them, not even raillery, whether public or private.  This couple was treated with respect and love just like everybody else.  We were all made better people because they were with us.

If, say, the hand ever says to the foot, “I have no need of thee,” I conclude that the hand doesn’t know what pressure and difficulty the foot labors under.  Neither does the hand recognize what the foot can do and does do for the hand.

How about you?  When have you as a “head” or “eye” learned you needed the “hand” or “foot”? 

Alma’s lessons for overcoming overbearing tendencies

Shiblon is generally considered one of Alma’s good sons who is mostly commended for good work and taking persecution well. However, recently I started to see that Alma’s instructions to Shiblon in Alma 38 seem to be mostly focused on trying to curb Shiblon’s pride and tendency to be overbearing.

Just what is being overbearing and why is it a problem?

I looked up “overbearing” and my dictionary widget said it meant “expecting unquestioning obedience; authoritarian, dictatorial, domineering; having or showing arrogant superiority to and disdain of those one views as unworthy.”

This is good as far as it goes, but I couldn’t fully understand it until I had had someone be overbearing at me. It was something I had to experience to recognize.

I’ve met some overbearing people and I’ve noticed that even when they say things I know are true and righteous, their manner of saying it makes me feel like they think I’m ignorant and uninterested in the things of God. Their manner makes me want to argue or prove that I am better than them by topping them. I find that it takes a lot of effort to keep a good attitude and frequently I find that I just have to escape. (Even more troubling, I’m beginning to realize that since I have begun to see it, there is a very high probability that I am afflicted with the very same problem and just can’t see it in myself.)

When I spent some time with someone who was overbearing, at the end of the encounter I knew there was something about their attitude that I didn’t like, but I couldn’t think of a good word to describe it. After pondering over it for a while, the term “overbearing” came to mind.

Now, how did I arrive at the conclusion that Shiblon had troubles with being overbearing? The best evidence is that Alma advised Shiblon in Alma 38:12 to “use boldness but not overbearance” and Alma probably would not give that specific bit unless it was needed.

After that, I began to notice that Alma’s other instructions started to come together into a pattern.

Alma’s instructions are:

• Remember to trust God for your deliverance (v5)
• There is no other means besides Christ we can be saved (v9)
• Be diligent and temperate in all things (v10)
• Don’t be lifted up in pride (v11)
• Don’t boast of your strength and wisdom (v11)
• Use boldness but not overbearance (v12)
• Bridle your passions (v12)
• Refrain from idleness (v12)
• Do not pray to be heard of men or praised for wisdom (v13)
• Do not thank God you are better than your brethren, but acknowledge your unworthiness before God at all times (v14)
• Pray for God to remember your brothers in mercy (v14)
• Be sober (v15)
• Continue to teach the word (v2, 15)

It seems that Shiblon was strong in the gospel and was rather proud of it. It seems he had a tendency to trust in his own strength rather than trusting God, so Alma tried to remind him that Christ was the one who did the saving. Alma also reminds Shiblon that Alma’s own testimony did not come from himself (Alma), but from the Spirit that made things known. This can seem particularly self-deprecating to us, considering Alma was the high priest over all the land (and we can’t help but think he’s totally awesome), but it underlines how Alma was trying to remind Shiblon that the credit for a testimony belongs to God.

After reading about this, I remembered there was a point when Shiblon became the one keeping the records (and possibly high priest in the land.) So I went looking for it. And I found it in Alma 63. And it happened during a period of Nephite history when there is great peace in the land coupled with great righteousness, which is told in Alma 62:49-51:

49 But notwithstanding their riches, or their strength, or their prosperity, they were not lifted up in the pride of their eyes; neither were they slow to remember the Lord their God; but they did humble themselves exceedingly before him.

50 Yea, they did remember how great things the Lord had done for them, that he had delivered them from death, and from bonds, and from prisons, and from all manner of afflictions, and he had delivered them out of the hands of their enemies.

51 And they did pray unto the Lord their God continually, insomuch that the Lord did bless them, according to his word, so that they did wax strong and prosper in the land. (Alma 62:49-52)

And then Shiblon takes possession of the sacred things at Helaman’s death, and then this extraordinary series of migrations away from Zarahemla begins. Scads of people leave in Alma 63, heading northward.

1 And it came to pass in the commencement of the thirty and sixth year of the reign of the judges over the people of Nephi, that Shiblon took possession of those sacred things which had been delivered unto Helaman by Alma.

2 And he was a just man, and he did walk uprightly before God; and he did observe to do good continually, to keep the commandments of the Lord his God; and also did his brother….

4 And it came to pass that in the thirty and seventh year of the reign of the judges, there was a large company of men, even to the amount of five thousand and four hundred men, with their wives and their children, departed out of the land of Zarahemla into the land which was northward.

5 And it came to pass that Hagoth, he being an exceedingly curious man, therefore he went forth and built him an exceedingly large ship, on the borders of the land Bountiful, by the land Desolation, and launched it forth into the west sea, by the narrow neck which led into the land northward.

6 And behold, there were many of the Nephites who did enter therein and did sail forth with much provisions, and also many women and children; and they took their course northward. And thus ended the thirty and seventh year.

7 And in the thirty and eighth year, this man built other ships. And the first ship did also return, and many more people did enter into it; and they also took much provisions, and set out again to the land northward.

8 And it came to pass that they were never heard of more. And we suppose that they were drowned in the depths of the sea. And it came to pass that one other ship also did sail forth; and whither she did go we know not.

9 And it came to pass that in this year there were many people who went forth into the land northward. And thus ended the thirty and eighth year. (Alma 63:

10 And it came to pass in the thirty and ninth year of the reign of the judges, Shiblon died also, and Corianton had gone forth to the land northward in a ship, to carry forth provisions unto the people who had gone forth into that land.

11 Therefore it became expedient for Shiblon to confer those sacred things, before his death, upon the son of Helaman, who was called Helaman, being called after the name of his father.

12 Now behold, all those engravings which were in the possession of Helaman were written and sent forth among the children of men throughout all the land, save it were those parts which had been commanded by Alma should not go forth. (Alma 63:1-2,4-12)

No contention whatsoever, just migration. This mass migration had always puzzled me, but I began to suspect that perhaps Shiblon didn’t conquer (or notice) his tendency to be overbearing, and perhaps his overbearing manner drove good people away and they felt like they had to escape. He may have even alienated his brother Corianton, since Corianton decided to take provisions to the people who had gone northward.

Maybe I am hard on Shiblon, but people don’t leave for no reason. There wasn’t contention in the land, yet they left. Shiblon had the records for three years, and then he died. When Shiblon (near death) passed on the records to Helaman’s son Helaman, Helaman did a smart thing and had the records copied and sent out in all the parts of the land so that people could benefit from the word of God without being bothered by a human transmitter-preacher. That way they could get the benefit of the scriptures themselves. Perhaps this was an effort to pull them back into the main church again.

It is rather disturbing to see Shiblon this way. We like to think of the good men of the scriptures as men without any personality flaw, but unfortunately, that isn’t very realistic because we know we all have flaws we have to overcome. To give Shiblon his due, he had some excellent points to his character too; he was patient under persecution, he was valiant at keeping the commandments of God, he was a just man, he walked uprightly before God, and he observed to do good continually. There was just that problem of overbearance.

To me, finding this out about Shiblon makes Alma 38 that much more valuable to me, since it provides a series of instructions that we can also use to make sure that we avoid being overbearing.

I have a feeling that I may be overbearing too on occasion, even though I can’t yet recognize exact times when I have been so. That means the only way I can escape this fault in my spiritual blind spot is to follow what Alma’s instructions in chapter 38. I can also pray for the Lord to help me repent. I’ll have to have the Lord help me recognize times when I have been overbearing and that will be painful because it will be times when I felt I was doing right and was proud of what I was doing. I will need to ask the Lord to help me know and practice the right way of treating people.

(Later)

Okay.

Heavenly Father helped me find out what happens when I am overbearing. At bottom, it arises out of my doubt in someone else’s dedication or commitment and an implicit assumption that I am better than them (pride). That leads me to a desire to control and force dedication and commitment in them by overemphasizing and overdoing my explanation. However, everyone is able to tell when someone doubts them, so when I doubt someone, they know it and they resent it, especially if they don’t think of themselves as having less dedication or commitment than me. Their resentment of being looked down upon leads them to want to resist me.

You know, I just have to say that I am so grateful that the Lord gave us the Book of Mormon for our day. The more I read it, the more I learn about what my flaws are, which gives me an opportunity to repent and get God’s help to change.